Thursday, September 30, 2004

Way Too Funny For Mere Mortals...

September 30, 2004

NOTE FROM CHRIS:

Warehouse retailer Costco Wholesale has
started selling six models of steel
caskets at its Chicago-area locations.

The Top 15 Reasons to Shop for a Casket at Costco
(Part I)

15> Gives you a nice place to rest while you wait in the checkout
line for half a day.

14> Let's just say that we now have a lot more room in Grandma's
old chest freezer.

13> No weird foreign-spice smells like those Cost Plus caskets.

12> To make the coffin-buying experience less depressing, you can
drink a sixer of Robitussin and delight the family with some
witty wordplay.

11> 2-for-1 savings: If you keep the cardboard box, you'll be all
set for the *next* funeral!

10> The average Costco employee is slightly less creepy than the
average funeral home worker.
Want the rest? Sorry... you have to go here: Club Top Five and subscribe... I do! (Trust me, it's soooooo worth it.)

DDDDUUUUUHHHH!!!!!

With SHIT like this getting spewed into space, is it any wonder aliens won't talk to us?
Read on...


CAMERON DIAZ ELECTION SCARE: 'IF YOU THINK RAPE SHOULD BE LEGAL, THEN DON'T VOTE'
Thu Sep 30 2004 12:12:11 ET

On Oprah's Wednesday 'voting party' show featuring important celebrities like P. Diddy (Vote or Die!), Drew Barrymore and Christina Aguilera, svelte suffragette Cameron Diaz took to shock tactics to get the female vote out.

After a discussion with Oprah on lynching and the vote, Diaz spoke of the dire consequences for women if they sit out this election:

Ms. DIAZ: We have a voice now, and we're not using it, and women have so much to lose. I mean, we could lose the right to our bodies. We could lo--if you think that rape should be legal, then don't vote. But if you think that you have a right to your body, and you have a right to say what happens to you and fight off that danger of losing that, then you should vote, and those are the...

WINFREY: It's your voice.

Ms. DIAZ: It's your voice. It's your voice, that's your right.

*courtesy DrudgeReport.com

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Mount St. Helens, Update 9-29-04

Mount St. Helens Volcano Advisory (Alert Level Two)

September 29, 2004 10:40A.M., PDT
Over night, seismic activity at Mount St. Helens has accelerated significantly, which increases our level of concern that current unrest could culminate in an eruption. We are increasing the alert level to the second of three levels, which is similar to Color Code Orange of the alert system used by the Alaska Volcano Observatory and analogous totheNational Weather Service’s hazardwatch. Earthquakes are occurring at about four per minute. The largest events are approaching Magnitude 2.5 and they are becoming more frequent. All are still at shallow levels in and below the lava dome that grew in the crater between 1980 and 1986. This suggests that the ongoing intense earthquake activity has weakened the dome, increasing the likelihood ofexplosions or perhaps the extrusion of lava from the dome.

...Full Story...

Woo-Hoo

SpaceShipOne Reaches Space Again

Wednesday, September 29, 2004
MOJAVE, Calif. — The first private manned rocket to reach space soared toward the edge of the atmosphere again on Wednesday in the first half of a bid to earn the $10 million Ansari X Prize (search).

SpaceShipOne (search), with astronaut Michael Melvill (search) at the controls, dropped away from its mother ship above Mojave Airport, fired its rocket and pulled into a vertical climb. The ship appeared to roll severely for a time but then steadied as it reached its intended altitude.

The specially designed jet with SpaceShipOne under its belly had taken off at 7:12 a.m. from the airport in the desert north of Los Angeles and began its climb.

A crowd of invited of VIPs watched from below the airport control tower, while news media watched from bleachers along the runway. Spectators, some wrapped in blankets to ward off the early morning chills, erupted in cheers as the spacecraft and its chase planes taxied down the runway.

At 47,000 feet, SpaceShipOne was released into a brief glide before Melvill fired its rocket motor and pointed the nose up toward space. After a few minutes of weightlessness, it fell back into the atmosphere and was gliding back to the airport.

...Full Story...

Kerry Has Allergic Reaction

DNC Announces Kerry Allergy

The DNC has denounced the ‘Wisconsin Tan’ story as a Karl Rove disinformation attack against the Democratic candidate. In a statement released today the Democratic Party has informed American voters that Mr. Kerry suffers from an allergic reaction to beer (see photo) as a result of his exposure to chemical weapons during his 'secret mission in Cambodia' thirty years ago.

"Mr. Rove knows full well that Mr. Kerry has suffered great health issues as a result of his gloriously heroic service in Vietnam." - said a senior official within the campaign.
"You don't see Mr. Bush turning orange," he continued, "I guess this proves who’s truly fit to lead this nation."

CBS News claims to have documents that support the DNC statement and plans to air an expose on the suspiciously pale skin tone of the president.

Teresa Heinz-Kerry said in a question and answer session that she loves the colors caused by this strange allergy... "It's like living with a life-sized ketchup bottle, very sexy."

There's been no reaction from the White House.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Speaking of Beer...

John Kerry might've had a few before giving this speech...

Kerry Warns Dairyland Voters of Secret Bush Plan
NEDRA PICKLER, Associated Press Writer

SPRING GREEN, Wis. - Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry told voters in America's Dairyland on Monday that President Bush had a secret plan that would hurt milk producers after the election.

Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.
... full story...
I know a lot of you out there like this guy, but come on already... when is this 'secret plan' stuff gonna end? First, it's a 'secret plan to start a new, bloody offensive after election day', then it's a 'secret plan to bring back the draft' and now a 'secret plan to hurt Dairy Farmers' ... It's makes him sound a little loopy...

mmm... beer...

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Benjamin Franklin

So stop by here:
BeerForSoldiers.com
and pony up some cash for this great and worthy cause!


Remember:
"No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer."
-John Churchill, First Duke of Marlborough

Monday, September 27, 2004

Mount St. Helens... Update

Small Earthquakes Rattle Mount St. Helens

PEGGY ANDERSEN, Associated Press Writer
SEATTLE - Small earthquakes rattled Mount St. Helens at the rate of one or two a minute Monday, and seismologists were working to determine the significance of some of the most intense seismic activity in nearly 20 years.

Carbon dioxide and sulfur gas samples collected above the volcano — which erupted to devastating effect in 1980 — will help scientists figure out what is going on beneath the 925-foot-high dome of hardened lava within the mountain's gaping crater. They want to know whether the quakes are the result of water seeping into the mountain or magma moving under its crater.

...more...
Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

First Hurricanes... Now This...

From the 'Thar She Blows' Files:

Mount St. Helens Notice of Volcanic Unrest
September 26, 2004 3:00 P.M., PDT

U.S. Geological Survey Cascades Volcano Observatory, Vancouver, Washington
University of Washington Dept. of Earth and Space Sciences, Seattle, Washington
Seismic activity at Mount St. Helens has changed significantly during the past 24 hours and the changes make us believe that there is an increased likelihood of a hazardous event, which warrants release of this Notice of Volcanic Unrest.

...get the rest here...

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Big-Ass Fungus Found!

From the 'Cool Shit' Files:

BIRMENSDORF, Switzerland
- Swiss scientists have discovered what they believe is Europe's biggest fungus, stretching wide under an Alpine forest.

The Honey Mushroom — also known by its Latin species name Armillaria ostoyae — was found lurking in the Engadine national park in the eastern Swiss Alps, said the Federal Institute for Forest, Snow and Landscape Research. Spanning 35 hectares (86 acres), the fungus it believed to be 1,000 years old, the institute added.

The underground fungus is only visible in the fall, when its mushrooms break through the earth and grow around the roots of trees, the institute said.

Although harmless to humans — its mushrooms are edible — the parasitic fungus can colonize trees, killing off swaths of pine forest.

In terms of size, the Swiss fungus is beaten hands down by another Honey Mushroom growing in the United States.

Found in the Malheur National Forest, in eastern Oregon, that fungus covers 890 hectares (2,200 acres) — making it the largest living organism ever discovered.

Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Happy Birthday... To ME!

Today's my birthday, so I'm not going to post anything on the blog today and maybe tomorrow (let's ignore this obvious contradiction...)

Hey, if you want to give me a birthday gift, stop by http://www.notweird.com and click the link on the bottom right hand of the page and give Narratives of the Weird a $1. (From which a LARGE portion will be donated to the family of a very young child who has Leukemia... there are little donation cups all over my home town and I'm going broke putting money in 'em. I thought this would be a better way to help.)

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Ghost Closes School

From the 'Sweet Justification' Files:

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - Fear of a ghost who knocks on doors and wafts the scent of aftershave lotion along corridors has forced a prestigious college for statisticians in the Indian capital to close.

Students of the Indian Statistical Institute said the ghost of a dead classmate had knocked on doors, jostled them on staircases and left traces of aftershave lotion and cigarette smoke, the Times of India said.

Students linked the aftershave aroma to a first-year student who died last month of a rare heart condition.

"A fear psychosis had gripped some students. We thought it was best to allow them to go home if they wanted to," the newspaper quoted Rajeev Karandikar, head of the prestigious institute, as saying.

Copyright © 2004 Reuters Limited. All rights reserved. Republication or re
distribution of Reuters content is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Reuters. Reuters shall not be liable for any errors or delays in the content, or for any actions taken in reliance thereon.

Monday, September 20, 2004

Naked Clean-Up! Yeah Baby!

From the 'Cool Shit' Files:

Mon Sep 20,11:12 AM ET
SANTA CRUZ, Calif. - The weekend cleanup of a popular stretch of beach netted the usual garbage: clothing, beer bottles and rusty nails.

What made the effort at Bonny Doon Beach different from cleanups elsewhere on the California coast were the volunteers: Many were nude.

Members of the Bay Area Naturists club were among those who collected 600 pounds of garbage at one of Northern California's most popular clothing-optional beaches, seven miles north of Santa Cruz.

"The real purpose is not the nakedness, but clearing up the trash," said Jurek Zarzycki, 54, as he scanned for refuse in the buff. "Every piece of garbage we find out here is testimony to somebody being a sloppy jerk."

His group has been helping clean trash from the beach for 17 years. The effort Saturday was part of the 20th annual California Coastal Cleanup Day, during which volunteers removed 750,000 pounds of trash from 700 locations on the state's shorelines.

The nippy weekend weather — it was 60 degrees at Bonny Doons — persuaded some of the naturists to keep their clothes on.

"Too cold," said Bill Todd, 64, a former San Mateo resident who flew out from his home in New York state on business and decided to join old friends in the naturist club. "You don't want the wind going where the wind shouldn't go."

Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Big River



Swollen Deleware

Cemetary



Cemetary flooded

Underpass



Roadway floods

Downtown Business


Downtown business prepares

Photos



Photo of Mata-Port Bridge taken minutes before mandatory evacuation order was issued...




Photo of West End Beach completely submerged by the Deleware River...




Shot from 'river road' in West End... note the highlighted area, it's an overturned rv trailer partially submerged. The river at this point is only a few inches from the road surface.

** Forgive the qualitiy of these photos, they were shot with a Sanyo VM4500 Camera Phone.

Round 'Em Up Noah!!

Breaking News:

Port Jervis, NY
A State of Emergency exists in Port Jervis NY and Matamoras PA.
As of this posting the Deleware River is 5 inches below flood stage. A madatory evacuation order in Matamoras has been issued and voluntary evacution for low-lying areas of P.J.

Developing...

Note, should the power go out, I'll post via cell phone.

The Voices Tell Me Secret Plans Are Afoot

From the 'Somebody Needs A Long Rest' Files:

Sep 17, 5:30 PM (ET)
By MARY DALRYMPLE

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. (AP) - Democratic Sen. John Kerry on Friday accused the Bush administration of hiding a plan to mobilize more National Guard and Reserve troops after the election while glossing over a worsening conflict in Iraq.

"He won't tell us what congressional leaders are now saying, that this administration is planning yet another substantial call-up of reservists and Guard units immediately after the election," Kerry said. "Hide it from people through the election, then make the move."

The White House called the allegation of a secret plan "completely irresponsible ... false and ridiculous." The Pentagon said troop replacements would include some from National Guard and Reserve units and those expected to be sent to Iraq had been notified.

While Bush has been campaigning as the best candidate to deter terrorists and protect the nation, his presidential rival portrayed him as out of touch with a serious and dangerous situation in Iraq.

"With all due respect to the president, has he turned on the evening news lately? Does he read the newspapers?" Kerry said. "Does he really know what's happening? Is he talking about the same war that the rest of us are talking about?"

Rep. John Murtha of Pennsylvania, top Democrat on the House Appropriations Defense Subcommittee and a former Marine who served in Vietnam, said he had learned through conversations with Pentagon officials that beginning in November, "the Bush administration plans to call up large numbers of the military Guard and Reserves, to include plans that they previously had put off to call up the Individual Ready Reserve."

Other Democrats joined Kerry in a chorus trying to drown out Bush's message on Iraq.

"It's clear that this administration didn't know what it was getting into, or else they grossly misrepresented the facts to the American people," said House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi of California. "In either case, staying the course is not an option."

Sen. Edward Kennedy of Massachusetts, campaigning for Kerry in Pennsylvania, said that in spite of bleak national intelligence estimates on Iraq, Bush still "goes out misrepresenting and distorting the progress that's being made over there."

Kerry said the president was avoiding hard truths about casualties, new insurgencies and troop shortages. "He won't tell us that, day by day, we're running out of soldiers and that we're now resorted to a backdoor draft of our reservists and our National Guard."

The Bush campaign denied the assertion about secret plans.

"John Kerry's conspiracy theory of a secret troop deployment is completely irresponsible," said spokesman Steve Schmidt. "John Kerry didn't launch this attack when he spoke to the National Guard because he knows they know it is false and ridiculous."

White House spokesman Scott McClellan said of Kerry: "He's struggling to explain his incoherent positions on Iraq. He's engaging in baseless attacks."

At the Pentagon, Lt. Col. Chris Rodney said, "There is no force increase that is expected."

The Army is on target to rotate into Iraq the same number of soldiers who will be leaving over the next six months, and all National Guard and Reserve units that are expected to be mobilized for the next rotation have been notified, the spokesman said.

Copyright 2004 Associated Press. All right reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Dog Eat Dog? Sure, But Not the Pure-Breds.

From the 'Mmmm, Tasty' Files:

Fri Sep 17, 3:33 AM ET

SEOUL, (AFP) - Three South Korean dog meat lovers were facing a 70,000-dollar lawsuit after cooking and eating their employer's pedigree dog, a news report said.

The men, all in their 50s and employed at a car-hire firm, killed and served up the dog in a traditional Korean soup dish during the employer's absence from the company parking lot where the animal was tethered, Yonhap news agency reported.

The owner said he would sue the three, claiming the dog was a Jindo, an expensive Korean pedigree breed, the news agency said. Police were also investigating the case.

Dog soup, or Boshintang, is a Korean delicacy served over the summer season.

Copyright © 2004 Agence France Presse. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AFP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of Agence France Presse.

It's The End of the World - AAUUGGHH!!

This report from http://www.jmccanneyscience.com/ passed over my desk this morning:

September 16, 2004 Special Hurricane Update notice ...
very bizarre solar conditions are occurring ... am investigating now and will be
posting as more information comes out ... also return for frequent updates
on hurricane Ivan, Javier and now Jeanne (with Isis in the pacific) ...
jim mccanney


UNUSUAL WEATHER INDEX EXTREME ... KEEP POSTED TO THE SUN
EARTH CONNECTION WEATHER LINK BELOW FOR UP TO THE MINUTE INFORMATION


MAGNETIC REVERSALS (caused by solar magnetic field reversing Earth's local PLASMA magnetic field) The solar magnetic field has been fluctuating wildly over the past 24 hours which means that the August Electrical Return Current Sheet is interacting strongly with the solar
wind and earth is in the midst of this (like 2 rivers flowing together) ...
SOLAR CONDITIONS ARE VERY UNSTABLE ,,, ERRATIC STORM MOVEMENTS ARE POSSIBLE AS
of Sept 15 a new phenomena is occurring with the plasma magnetic field ... it is changing much more rapidly than previously causing significant "hole" production allowing the solar wind to pound into earth directly .


SOLAR WIND DYNAMIC PRESSURE FLUCTUATING WILDLY ... WE ARE
IN THE EDDY CURRENTS CAUSED BY THE SOLAR WIND REACTING TO THE AUGUST ELECTRICAL RETURN CURRENT SHEET ... WE CONTINUE TO SEE SEVERE TURBULENCE IN THE SOLAR WIND AS IT INTERACTS WITH THE ELECTRICAL AUGUST RETURN CURRENT SHEET.
Normally, I listen to reports from news outlets that are, to be fair, out of the mainstream with only a half an ear, but when I saw this piece from http://drudgereport.com/flash.htm discussing a UN report on the dramatic increase of natural disasters since 1990, I began to realize that we know next to nothing about the weather patterns of our own solar system and how those patterns affect this planet. And Jim McCanney might onto something.

We may be heading into a dangerous storm cycle within our solar system. Don't kiss your ass goodbye yet, but keep your lips puckered... just in case.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Salt Lake Issues No-Fly Order to Santa

From the "Merry-F**king Christmas" Files:

Proposed changes to Salt Lake City's aviation rules, which would remove Santa Claus's exemption from minimum altitude rules, have left residents bemused.

The rules say that small aircraft must maintain an altitude of more than 610 metres while flying over the city.

However, in a bid to be more 'professional' the department of airports has removed Santa's exemption.

In the minds of some Salt Lake City residents, the change conjures up images of the famous curmudgeon from Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol .

Executive director of the department of airports, Tim Campbell, says the panel is not staffed by a bunch of Scrooges, it is just trying to be modern and professional.

"We were updating the ordinance and this provision had not been looked at for a number of years," Mr Campbell said.

"Members of the panel felt it was just not appropriate," added Mr Campbell, who voted to retain the Santa exemption.

The Salt Lake City Council, which must approve the change, is not amused.

"I have a 4-year-old who still believes in Santa Claus," disappointed council man Carlton Christensen said.

The council is expected to vote on the proposed general aviation code changes next month.

Santa Claus could not be reached for comment, but a number of concerned citizens have vowed to attend the council meeting to voice their concern.

Copyright © 2004 Reuters Limited. All rights reserved. Republication or redistribution of Reuters content is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Reuters. Reuters shall not be liable for any errors or delays in the content, or for any actions taken in reliance thereon.

Thieves Rob Bus Full of Policemen

From the 'Hello Dumbass' Files:

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (Reuters) - Forty-six Brazilian policemen traveling to a sports competition were caught with their guard down this week when four Brazilian thieves robbed the bus carrying them to the event.

The bus with 46 unarmed policemen from northeastern Paraiba state was headed to the city of Salvador in Bahia when two cars with armed robbers forced them to stop on the country's main interstate highway on Tuesday.

"The robbers took their cameras, cellular phones, wallets and even the sports uniforms and sneakers," a police spokesman said.

The suspects, who escaped, apparently did not know the bus was full of police when they stopped it, he said.

"We are looking for them, but I cannot say there's any particular ardor here due to the fact that policemen have been robbed."

Copyright © 2004 Reuters Limited. All rights reserved. Republication or redistribution of Reuters content is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Reuters. Reuters shall not be liable for any errors or delays in the content, or for any actions taken in reliance thereon.

"Let Them Go Naked"

From the 'She Irks The Crap Outta Me' Files:

Wed Sep 15, 6:05 PM ET

By SAM DOLNICK, Associated Press Writer

NEW YORK - Teresa Heinz Kerry, encouraging volunteers as they busily packed supplies Wednesday for hurricane relief efforts in the Caribbean, said she was concerned the effort was too focused on sending clothes instead of essentials like water and electric generators.

"Clothing is wonderful, but let them go naked for a while, at least the kids," said Heinz Kerry, the wife of Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry. "Water is necessary, and then generators, and then food, and then clothes."

Heinz Kerry stopped by a market in the heart of Brooklyn's Caribbean community, where she spoke French with Haitian vendors and shook hands with volunteers busy packing food, clothes and other relief supplies to be shipped to several Carribean islands hit by Hurricane Ivan. Her husband's campaign donated water, blankets and first aid kits.

"I think it's important we help all the kids we can," Heinz Kerry said.

Ivan swept through the Caribbean last week, killing more than 60 people and leaving tens of thousands homeless.

Dr. Roy A. Hastick Sr., president of the Caribbean American Chamber of Commerce (news - web sites) and coordinator of the market's relief effort, said the visit helped make difficult days a bit brighter.

"It's a major boost for us and the community to show we have someone on a national level concerned with what's happening in the Caribbean region," Hastick Sr. said.

Supporters gathered on the sidewalk shouted "We love you," and "Good luck" as Heinz Kerry made her way to a waiting car.

Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Knight in ‘The Shining’ Armor!

From the 'Cool Shit' Files:

HOLLYWOOD legend Jack Nicholson became a real life hero when he rescued a woman after a car crash. The star raced to the scene when two cars ahead of him smashed into each other.

When one of the vehicles tipped over, trapping a young woman inside, Nicholson stopped on the busy road in Venice, California, and ran over to help.

He reassured the driver, who had suffered cuts and bruises, telling her: 'Just stay calm, help is on its way.'

He then managed to open the car's passenger door to get the woman out.

When the stunned woman realised who had rescued her, she was quick to tell him how much she liked his work.

She told the star: 'I'm such a fan, and I'm an actor too. I've just arrived from Texas to start my showbiz career.'

Nicholson then wished her the best of luck. He said: 'It's a tough business, babe, but I wish you well.'

He stayed with her until an ambulance arrived and then left after receiving a kiss.

Courtesy: http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk

MMM...Beer...

From the 'Been Telling My Wife This For Years' Files:

TORONTO - Beer, a health food? That's what some Canadian researchers report.

A study from the University of Western Ontario finds a brew could be good for you. The researchers say beer has antioxidant boosters that could help fight cancer, heart disease and diabetes.

But the key is moderation. The researchers found three beers would have the opposite effect.
The study was funded by beermakers Guinness and Labatt. But the university says the financial support had no influence on the outcome.

Copyright © 2004 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Britney's Mom Upset With Trashy Image, Prefers Slutty

From the 'Pull Yer Head Outta Yer Ass' Files:

POSTED: 2:49 pm EDT September 14, 2004


Britney Spears' mother has had enough with the media trying to paint her daughter as trashy.

Lynne Spears writes on her daughter's Web site she's come across numerous photos trying to paint her daughter that way.

Lynne Spears says in one photo, Spears stepped on her floor-length skirt and it pulled down too low in the front. She said she's sure that's happened to lots of girls before -- but there weren't hordes of paparazzi around.

Also, Lynne Spears said her daughter has been appearing barefoot a lot because she needs to wear only tennis shoes because of her knee problems and they're too hot.

Lynne Spears said Britney "is not one that is going to give into the pressures of dressing up every single day in order to impress the paparazzi vultures."

Copyright 2004 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Monday, September 13, 2004

Man Exhumes and Eats Grandson

From the 'Ever Been That Hungry?' Files:

Mon Sep 13, 8:41 AM ET

LUSAKA (Reuters) - Zambian police have arrested a man who exhumed, cooked and ate part of his grandson's corpse, police said Monday.

Police spokeswoman Brenda Muntemba said a hunter found the man eating pieces of flesh in a graveyard in Milambo, 600 km (370 miles) north of the capital Lusaka.

"The man exhumed a corpse and cut off some flesh which he cooked in a pot and started eating ... we went to the grave of his grandson and verified that he had exhumed the body," Muntemba told Reuters.

Muntemba said police had no idea why the man, who had no history of madness, had started eating his grandson, who died in July. The man was charged with interfering with a dead body and also for trespass in the graveyard.

Copyright © 2004 Reuters Limited. All rights reserved. Republication or redistribution of Reuters content is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Reuters. Reuters shall not be liable for any errors or delays in the content, or for any actions taken in reliance thereon.

The Fairness Debate:

I'm not the only one who sees it:

The two economists combed through 389 newspapers and A.P. reports contained in the LexisNexis database from January 1991 through May 2004, during the administrations of George H. W. Bush, Bill Clinton and George W. Bush. They picked out headlines about gross domestic product growth, unemployment, retail sales and orders of durable goods and classified the headlines' depiction of the economy as either positive, negative, neutral or mixed. Then they crunched some numbers.

They found that Mr. Clinton received better headlines than the two Republican presidents. Even after adjusting the data to compensate for differences in economic performance under the three presidents, the Republicans received 20 to 30 percent fewer positive headlines, on average, for the same type of news, they concluded.

For instance, they said, the unemployment rate in the Clinton administration averaged 5.2 percent, only three-tenths of a percentage point less than it has under George W. Bush. But while 44 percent of Mr. Clinton's headlines on unemployment were positive, only 23 percent of President Bush's headlines on the subject have been upbeat.

They found that as a group, the nation's 10 largest newspapers and The Associated Press were even more skewed. According to the researchers, this group gave Republican administrations 20 to 40 percent fewer positive headlines than those given to Mr. Clinton, on average. Among the top 10 newspapers, they said that all except The Houston Chronicle had a pro-Democratic leaning, though the margin for error in their calculations was too large to be meaningful for most of them individually.

...Full story...

Copyright 2004 The New York Times Company

Sunday, September 12, 2004

Mushroom Cloud Reported - (UPDATE 9-/13/04)

According to CNN National Security Correspondent David Ensor and Correspondent Sohn Jie-Ae:

A large cloud that appeared over North Korea in satellite images several days ago was not the result of a nuclear explosion, according to a U.S. official.

The U.S. official said the cloud could be the result of a forest fire.

Full report here:
http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/asiapcf/09/12/nkorea.blast/index.html

** Think about this: The U.S. and South Korean governments have just taken a position that a 2.5 mile wide mushroom cloud was the result of an explosion caused by a forest fire...

By comparison: Thermonuclear warhead tests: Operation Ivy, MIKE EVENT - produced a fireball measuring 3.25 miles in diameter - 31 October 1952.


UPDATE: 9/13/04
From the 'Sweet Smell Of Cover-up' Files:

Report: N.Korea Says Explosion Was Planned

SEOUL, South Korea (AP) - North Korea said Monday that a huge cloud caused by an explosion near its border with China several days ago was the planned demolition of a mountain for a hydroelectric project, British media reported.

...Full Story...

Mushroom Cloud Reported

Big Blast, Mushroom Cloud Reported in N.Korea
http://olympics.reuters.com/newsArticle.jhtml?type=topNews&storyID=6211175

By Kim Miyoung and Paul Eckert
SEOUL (Reuters) - A huge explosion rocked North Korea near the border with China three days ago, producing a mushroom cloud that sparked speculation Pyongyang might have tested an atomic weapon, Yonhap news agency reported on Sunday.

The South Korean agency said the blast on Thursday in Kimhyungjik county in Ryanggang province appeared much bigger than a train explosion that killed at least 170 people in April.

South Korean Unification Minister Chung Dong-young sought to play down an atomic link, telling South Korean reporters after a National Security Council meeting that Seoul's assessment so far was the explosion was unlikely to have been part of the communist North's nuclear arms ambitions.

"There are some foreign media reporting such possibilities, but we are judging at the moment the explosion is unrelated to such reports," Yonhap quoted him as saying. Chung chairs the National Security Council, which advises President Roh Moo-hyun.

There was no immediate reaction from neighboring China. In Washington, a U.S. official said it was unclear what had happened and there were various possible explanations. Tokyo took a similar line.

"We've heard the report, and we are checking the details, including what's in the report itself," said Japanese Foreign Ministry spokesman Akira Chiba.

Thursday was the 56th anniversary of North Korea's founding. The reclusive communist state often stages extravaganzas and big events to mark important anniversaries.

South Korean intelligence officials said they were monitoring the news, but declined detailed comment on the reports, which were based on "informed sources" in Beijing and in Seoul. Yonhap did not give a description of the blast site.

ACCIDENT OR TEST?

The reports surfaced as South Korea, Japan, China, Russia and the United States were seeking to persuade North Korea to return to the negotiating table to discuss its nuclear weapons ambitions. The North, which threatened at earlier talks to test an atomic bomb, has said it doubts more negotiations will help.

"There were rumors that the explosion was much bigger than the one at Ryongchon train station and the United States is showing a big interest as the blast was seen from satellites," Yonhap quoted an unnamed source in Beijing as saying.

The cause had yet to be determined but the source said Washington was not ruling out the possibility that the blast may be linked to a nuclear test.
China was the last country to set off an above-ground nuclear test, in 1980. It carried out its last nuclear test in 1996 and has since observed a self-imposed moratorium on testing.

Yonhap quoted other unnamed officials as saying it was probably not an accident, although it also quoted one source in Washington as saying it was unlikely to have been a nuclear test. It quoted another source as saying it could be a forest fire.

Yonhap reported a mushroom cloud up to 2.5 miles in diameter was spotted after the blast in remote Ryanggang province in the country's far northeast near to known missile bases.

The New York Times reported in its Sunday editions the Bush administration had received recent intelligence reports that some experts believed could indicate North Korea was preparing to conduct its first nuclear weapons test explosion.

Train wagons exploded at the Ryongchon railway station on April 22, killing 170 and injuring an estimated 1,300. The blast was believed to have been caused by a train loaded with oil and chemicals hitting a power line. (Additional reporting by Arshad Mohammed in Washington and Isabel Reynolds in Tokyo)

© Reuters 2004. All Rights Reserved.

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Jeopardy Fans, Don't Read This!

Internet buzz:
Ken Jennings will play approximately 75 games and win around 2.5 million.

I really wish I didn't know this...

Dog Shoots Man in Self-Defense


From the 'Revenge Is Sweet' Files:

PENSACOLA, Fla. -- A man who was trying to shoot seven puppies was shot himself when one of the dogs made the .38-caliber revolver discharge, deputies said.

Jerry Allen Bradford, 37, of Pensacola, was charged with felony animal cruelty, the Escambia County Sheriff's Office said Wednesday.

Bradford was being treated at an undisclosed hospital for the gunshot wound to his wrist, said sheriff's Sgt. Ted Roy.

Bradford said he decided to shoot the 3-month-old puppies in the head because he couldn't find another home for the shepherd-mix dogs, according to the sheriff's office.

On Monday, he was holding two puppies, one in his arms and another in his left hand, when the dog in his hand wiggled and put its paw on the trigger, making the gun discharge, the sheriff's report said.

The revolver and a rifle were seized from the home, deputies said.

Deputies found three of the puppies in a shallow grave outside Bradford's home, Roy said. The other four appeared to be in good health and were taken by Escambia County Animal Control, which planned to make them available for adoption.

"That should never have to happen," said Bruce Rova, director of the Escambia County Animal Shelter. "There are so many options people have. We'll try to find them a new home."

Copyright 2004 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Classy...

I don't why, but for some strange reason, this woman irks the crap outta me (and it's not because she's a 'strong, outspoken' woman, I'm married to a strong, outspoken woman and I prefer strong outspoken women.) ... read on...


Heinz Kerry: Opponents Of Health Care Plan Are 'Idiots'

Candidate's Wife Doesn't Mince Words
Teresa Heinz Kerry says "only an idiot" would fail to support her husband's health care plan.

But Heinz Kerry, the wife of Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry, told the (Lancaster) Intelligencer Journal that "of course, there are idiots."

Kerry's proposal includes health care subsidies for children, the unemployed, small companies and more; and government assistance to insurers and employers that keep premiums for workers down.

If Kerry is elected, Heinz Kerry predicts that opponents of his health care plan will be voted out of office. She says, "Only an idiot wouldn't like this."

Heinz Kerry stumped in Lancaster, Harrisburg and York on Wednesday, the third day of a four-day campaign swing through Pennsylvania.

On Thursday, she holds a roundtable discussion health care at a hotel in King of Prussia.

Copyright 2004 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

He Ain't Quincy...



From the 'Whoops' File:

Coroner Shoots Self In Leg While Discussing Gun Safety
POSTED: 3:29 pm EDT September 8, 2004

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. -- A gun safety demonstration went awry and landed Monroe County Coroner David Toumey in the hospital after he shot himself in the leg.
Toumey said his gun discharged as he was checking to make sure it was unloaded and a bullet struck him in his left leg during the demonstration to a group of people at a Lake Monroe boat ramp on Sept. 1.

"It's an unfortunate accident," Toumey told The Herald-Times of Bloomington. "I've always been very, very safe."

Toumey was released from Methodist Hospital in Indianapolis after treatment, the hospital said Wednesday.

Copyright 2004 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

To Hell With Objectivity! - UPDATED 9/10/04

Today, due to the release of new records, the alphabets and newspapers are going to report EXTENSIVELY on George Bush’s National Guard duty in an attempt to undermine his reelection bid. As the information about these interviews and reports pass over my desk, I couldn’t help but think… Where is this scrutiny of John Kerry’s service records? After all, he made it the centerpiece of his campaign (refer to the DNC convention). Where is the outrage and reporting of John Kerry’s missing six years? In case you didn’t know, Kerry’s term of service ended in ’72 but he wasn’t discharged until ’78. Where is the scrutiny over three separate citations for one medal, or the Silver Star V a medal that has never been issued by the Navy?

You won’t hear about it, at least not in the ‘mainstream’ news media.

From my relative position of ‘safety’ as an editor for a little known paranormal newsletter far from the fray of everyday journalism, I have a unique vantage point… and I can honestly say, media bias is rampant in this presidential campaign. In all my years of following news and political debate *never* have I seen this much blatant disregard for objectivity and fairness. I’m only talking about the hard news outlets, ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, MSNBC, FOXNEWS, and any given newspaper. Talk radio is excluded from this critique. Let me explain why…

Although there’s no denying the popularity and broad range of the talk radio shows, they have to be excluded from this criticism of news media for one reason: they are not news media! They operate under the banner of entertainment, not hard news. Yes, I’m talking about Rush Limbaugh, et al. Never have I heard Limbaugh, Hannity, Ingraham, Savage, Frankin, Garafolo, say they were journalists. I have heard them refer to themselves as entertainers and political observers. This gives them the same hard news credentials John Madden has as he ‘reports’ the game action from the sidelines.

The hard news outlets have to be held to a higher standard, or so they tell us. We’ve always been told that objectivity and truth are the lights with which they guide us through the events of the day. Ah but were it so.

UPDATE 9-9-04:
'60 Minutes' Documents on Bush Might Be Fake

http://www.cnsnews.com//ViewPolitics.asp?Page=\Politics\archive\200409\POL20040909d.html

Son of Late Officer Questions Bush Memos
http://abcnews.go.com/wire/Politics/ap20040909_1710.html

Are the CBS National Guard Documents Fake?http://www.indcjournal.com/archives/000838.php

Is It a Hoax? Experts weigh in on the 60 Minutes documents
http://weeklystandard.com/Utilities/printer_preview.asp?idArticle=4596&R=9FCD2F192

** WHY DIDN'T THEY FACT CHECK THE HELL OUT OF THESE DOCUMENTS BEFORE REPORTING ON THEM? ** It confirms that there is a definite and deliberate bias in the news media.

*** CBSNEWS LAUNCHES INTERNAL INVESTIGATION AFTER SUSPICIOUS BUSH DOCS AIRED
http://drudgereport.com/cbsd.htm

- It's usually common to check your facts *before* air-time Dan... unless you have an agenda that is, then facts be damned.

I’m going to make a prediction.
If these documents are truly found fake as a result of the CBS internal ‘investigation’, First, Dan Blather will offer a token apology on 60 mynutes, that’ll come off as half-hearted and dismissive. And afterward the Libs will throw blame in so many directions (including Karl Rove and the RNC) that it’ll be almost impossible to back-track to the true source…Time will tell…

AUDIO UPDATE:
AUDIO - Daughter of Ben Barnes Disputes Father's Claims as Political
http://rope.wbap.com/audio/barnes.wma

Friday, September 03, 2004

Funny as hell...

Somebody sent this yesterday:
Heap of Trouble

I wouldn't recommend it to those under 16. Great English humor.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Mysterious signals from 1000 light years away

19:00 01 September 04

Exclusive from New Scientist Print Edition. Subscribe and get 4 free issues.

In February 2003, astronomers involved in the search for extraterrestrial intelligence (SETI) pointed the massive radio telescope in Arecibo, Puerto Rico, at around 200 sections of the sky.

The same telescope had previously detected unexplained radio signals at least twice from each of these regions, and the astronomers were trying to reconfirm the findings. The team has now finished analysing the data, and all the signals seem to have disappeared. Except one, which has got stronger.

This radio signal, now seen on three separate occasions, is an enigma. It could be generated by a previously unknown astronomical phenomenon. Or it could be something much more mundane, maybe an artefact of the telescope itself.

But it also happens to be the best candidate yet for a contact by intelligent aliens in the nearly six-year history of the SETI@home project, which uses programs running as screensavers on millions of personal computers worldwide to sift through signals picked up by the Arecibo telescope.

...more...

Eugenie Samuel Reich

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